What About Us?

Yesterday I read an article in the BV on Money section over at AOL Black Voices where the author Dr. Boyce Watkins asserts that top tier business schools in the U.S. put forth minimal effort to recruit black students and faculty. He stated that despite the Johnson School of Management at Cornell University's 21 percent enrollment of underrepresented minorities in their MBA program in 2010, he could count the number of black graduates on one hand. Mind you, the statistics did not say "black underrepresented minorities," but simply "minorities."

These are Watkins' main assertions:

The disparities in minority representation in American business schools is symptomatic of white supremacy in quite a few ways. Most significantly, there is a perception that the lack of minority presence is due to African Americans simply being unqualified or unwilling to "step up to the plate" to take advantage of the opportunities in question. This is the "lazy black people theory," that presents the elitists who run such institutions as benevolent caretakers who are simply hoping that minorities will walk through the doors these universities have been gracious enough to open for them. The truth, however, is that many of these doors are closed, and I've got an email box full of notes from angry black professors who've jumped through all the hoops of qualification only to find that they're being consistently rejected by predominantly white institutions. . .

There is also the belief that minorities are simply not good enough to get jobs or attend many of these institutions. The truth is that we are just as qualified as whites, but because whites are the standard bearers on educational achievement with the ability to reward and punish, there is the mistake of presuming that being different means that you are somehow inferior.

I'm certain that there exists racism in universities and entities designed to keep blacks beneath a glass ceiling, but if we insist that racism is at the root of the problem every time we take note of underrepresented black in prestigious schools, then we will never realize the real problem: our lack of knowledge of and preparation for careers in Business and Finance. Our minimal presence in notable business schools is less of an issue of whites keeping us out than of our parents, guardians, guidance counselors, and teachers failing to prepare us to get in! If students fail to graduate from high school and, let alone, college, why would they be remotely interested in pursuing an education in an MBA program?

The sole or main responsibility of recruiting black students to business schools does not lie within recruiters, but with those who raise and educate us prior to our college matriculation. Though racism is alive and well in America, hard work, perseverance, God's providence, and a positive attitude will always place you exactly where you need to be. Yes, there are many stories about qualified black students and faculty who were rejected from schools, but there are an even greater number of stories of how black youth are abandoned and left to navigate their way through life and the workforce without the guidance of adults to show them opportunities and options beyond the dismal ones they see in their everyday lives.

It's high time we take responsibility for both our successes and failures.

Exotic vs Regular Black Girls

A few months ago, I read an article over a A Belle In Brooklyn detailing how one of B's friends was denied entrance into a club because she didn't meet the "visual aesthetic" requirement. Translation: She didn't look good enough by the club's standards. This woman was educated, successful, well-groomed, etc., but she happened to be just a "regular black girl," meaning that her skin was probably a little too dark for (the bouncer's) comfort or that she didn't possess a trace of European or "exotic" features such as curly/wavy hair, light eyes, or an arrow-straight nose. Though this particular incident occurred in NYC, I hear that this type of discrimination has become the norm at clubs and lounges across the U.S. Women are literally being turned away by doormen for not aesthetically meeting the standards. Even outside of the club scene, there's seems to be an ever-growing appreciation of, preference for, and darn near adoration of black women who are and who seem to be mixed with another race. Black people, I thought we'd come a little further than this. Smh. To be honest, this is a very, very complex issue that cannot be satisfiably discoursed in this blog post. Naturally, I would want to take into account self-hatred stemming from slavery and a plethora of other possible factors, but the point of the post is to incite conversation to help answer the question of "What's the preoccupation with mixed and non-black women?" Why do some of our men seem to prefer these women and why do some women take ridiculous strides to look exotic?

When did it become not enough to be just a regular black girl?

Is it an issue of the infamous "black girl attitude" or is it as simple as complexion? I've gone to school with and have seen very beautiful "regular black girls." Some of them even had skin as dark as coal! And might I add that it was flawless. *jealous* So what gives? I know better than to generalize and say that many or most black people prefer to look exotic or be on the arm of an exotic looking woman, but what's the deal with the complexion and ethnicity preoccupation?

Here's a comment that I totally agree with from a young woman named Courtney :

One of my best friends is a light-skinned black girl with chinky eyes. People are always mistaking her for Asian, but from what she knows about her family history, she is just a normal black girl. She sometimes gets offended when guys ask her if she is black and Asian because she is like "why do I always have to be something else besides just black." I do notice that when we go out and guys try to holla at her, the first thing they say is "so you mixed with Asian." She is always quick to correct the person and never take their statement for a compliment because she recognizes the flaw in their comment. In many cases females take pride in being mistaken for black and something else. I feel like if more people saw the beauty in being just a "normal black girl," like my bff, and correct those who mistake them to be mixed with some other ethnicity, then we will be taking one progressive step in getting back to the time when being just a black girl was good enough.

Discuss!

Product Review: Uncle Funky's Daughter

Photo courtesy of UncleFunkysdaughter.com

As many of you know, I am a certified product junkie. And ever since I went natural, my habit has gotten even worse! I'm always looking for the next great product with the perfect balance of moisture and hold to give me poppin' and long-lasting curls  for my twistouts (my staple hairstyle). I found out about the Uncle Funky's Daughter product line while watching a tutorial over at Mahogany Knots. One of the products used for the particular hairstyle was "Supercurl." Being the fiend that I am, I immediately Googled UFD and looked for Supercurl. After reading the description and ingredients about 100 times, I decided to purchase a jar along with a jar of "Extra Butter" pro-shine moisturizer.

Both Supercurl and  Extra Butter claim to stretch out kinks and curls and add incredible moisture. Ladies, let me attest that it's true!  When I take my twists out after letting them partially dry under the hooded dryer then overnight, my curls are defined, shiny, soft, and stretched out. No lie. I used to twist my hair  twice a week, but with these products, I only need to twist once for a full week of a moisturized and non-frizzy twistout. All I have to do is pineapple (gather my curls to the crown of my head with a loose elastic headband) my hair at night, shake it out in the morning and refresh the hair with a dollop of Supercurl and a light finishing mist for extra shine. With these products, second-day hair is indeed possible!

Curlyheads, what are your must-have hair products?

***Disclaimer: I am not affiliated with Uncle Funky's Daughter. I bought these products with my own money and am not receiving compensation in any form from said company for writing this review.

Chocolate Fix of the Week: Eric Nicoleau

Photo courtesy: Dieu Cheri Photography

Ladies, how fortunate was I to have randomly run across this man's Twitter page last week! Allow me to introduce model, actor in training, and personal trainer Eric Nicoleau. Want to feel close to him? Follow him on Twitter.

Photo courtesy: Dieu Cheri Photography

Photo courtesy: Tarrice Love

. . .Because everyone loves chocolate.

Joy for the Journey

This week somebody said something to me that absolutely rubbed me the wrong way. The comment that was made seemed seemed obnoxious and pretentious. I thought to myself, "If you can't find what I suggested to be useful to YOU then don't bother saying anything." I was a bit upset about the comment until God spoke to me and gave me three nuggets of wisdom that I want to share with you:

1. Be grateful: Focus on your own journey, and never fail to remember where God has brought you from.  Remind yourself that there are people that view your position as a step up from theirs.

2. Celebrate the success of others: When you do this instead of hating, you open yourself up to possibly gain some insight into how they were elevated.

3. Make the most of your current situation: If you want a better job or you want to be in a more favorable position, make sure that you're putting forth your best effort in the one you have. You can't expect to get better than you give.

Book Review: Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office

Photo courtesy of Google Images

As I delved into the "real world" back in September when I accepted a job at an advertising agency, I searched for some resources to help give me a competitive edge. Aware that my sometimes timid nature would not fly in the workplace and help me progress, I picked up Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers, highly recommended by writer, blogger, and soon-to-be life, relationship, and career coach Demetria Lucas of A Belle in Brooklyn.
Upon starting the book, I knew that I possessed the capabilities to produce stellar work, but I was also aware that simply having the goods is not enough. I had to display my ability and speak up! As the saying goes, "a closed mouth doesn't get feed," and to that I'll add, "The quiet, hard worker does not get openly acknowledged or rewarded." Well, she might, but she shouldn't expect to. Working hard and waiting to be noticed will not get you the recognition and promotion you may be very deserving of. Lois P. Frankel, author of Nice Girls, maps out 101 mistakes that woman make in the workplace that may be stagnating their careers. She categorizes these mistakes into seven behavioral categories:

1.How You Play the Game
2 How You Act
3. How You Think
4.How You Brand and Market Yourself
5. How You Sound
6. How You Look and
7. How You Respond. 

Mistakes of particular interest to me were #8: Waiting to Be Given What You Want, #45: Failing to Define Your Brand, #51: Staying in Your Safety Zone, and #55: Being Invisible. Becoming aware of these mistakes helped me to correct these errors by replacing them with more assertive and proactive behaviors. I've already noticed a change in how I act at work. I'm more conscious of building relationships with co-workers by simply making it a point to chat about non-work related topics. It's as simple as stopping by their office to say hi or ask how their weekend was. And you know what? They go out of their way to return the favor! I also make it clear to my supervisor when I'm interested in taking on more challenging projects.Exuding confidence and taking initiative has opened the door for me to take on responsibilities outside of my job description. Sometimes the key to getting the most out of your job is being willing to learn something new. You'll be surprised at the additional skills you may acquire.

If you want to kick your work performance into high gear, I highly recommend this book. Nice Girls not only denotes mistakes, but provides concise and specific coaching tips to help turn negative or passive behaviors into positive and assertive ones.

What books have you read that have helped you succeed?

Chocolate Fix of the Week: David Oliver

Add caption

I know 3 things about David Oliver:

1. He's an Olympic hurdler, 
2. He does it very well, and
3. He looks good doing it!

And what do you know? He's a fellow blogger! Check him out
at  http://davidoliverhurdles.blogspot.com/ and on his website.

. . .Because everyone loves chocolate

Photos courtesy of Google Images

Album Review: Floetic Soul

Photo courtesy of Amazon.com

Natalie "The Floacist" Stewart, one half of the now disbanded Neo Soul duo "Floetry," released her first solo album last month titled Floetic Soul. I first heard a snippet of the extremely smooth cut "Forever" featuring Musiq Soulchild while listening to Tariq Nasheed's Mack Lessons radio show late one night. Though I had no idea who the artist was, I was hooked from the first few bars and frantically scoured the Internet looking for the song by putting the lyrics into the Google search engine. Once I discovered that it was Natalie, I learned that she had already released an official music video. Nice! That song was enough to make me want to buy the album (after listening to the rest of the samples on Amazon, of course). A few days later I had my copy of Floetic Soul and the rest is history. My obvious favorite song "Forever" is a stand-out track, showcasing Natalie's sing-speak style spoken over beautiful harmonies and a sexy, slow and steady beat. Though Natalie holds her own, Musiq is the icing on the cake, lending his smooth, unique vocals as he co-signs and ad libs in a call and response style to every line.These two are a duet made in heaven. No doubt that this song will be a hit at weddings in 2011.

Other noteworthy tracks include the upbeat "Keep It Going" featuring Raheem DeVaughn, "Come Over" featuring Lalah Hathaway, "Need You," and the opening track "Breathe". Noted by some as "inspirational and relaxing," Floetic Soul is just that. Pop this CD into your player or put iPod on, and feel the stress disseminate from the opening track. It's guaranteed to put your in the right mood.

Neo Soul is not dead.

What's your favorite track?

F.E.A.R.--False Evidence Appearing Real

Whew! I can finally come up for air! I have the day off today, but I'm going to my boss's house this afternoon for lunch. The whole agency staff will be there, so I'll get to schmooze a bit. What to wear? What to wear? *taps chin*

During my ride home on the Metro last night while reading Eat, Pray, Love, I began to think about all of the things I want to do, but am afraid to do for no apparent reason. One of those things is seeing the world. I sometimes fantasize about traveling abroad alone, just to see if I can do it, but then the questions come flooding in: Where will I stay? How will I understand the language? Will I be safe? Will I make friends? What if I get lost?

Oh, the worry! It's pathetic. Sometimes I believe that it's guilt that insists that I remain sheltered and slightly unadventurous. But why should I feel guilty about being young, free, and inquisitive? Why am I so afraid to make mistakes?

I'd hate to reach my elderly years regretting not taking risks and embracing adventure, realizing that the world isn't a big and scary place as I had imagined. I don't want to be burdened with the questions of what could go wrong, but I want to embrace the possibility that everything that could go right, amazingly better than what I could have ever imagined. I'm taking a trip to Jamaica later this month to walk in a friend's wedding and I have every intention of opening myself completely to the experience, to the people, to exploring the land, to everything. I'm committing myself to just being and just doing without fear or guilt.

What are some things holding you back from living your life to the fullest?